July Chronicles of A Bohemian

Shaking Paper - Cat Power

Hey it's July! This space has not been idle. Many words have floated in and out of this screen, I just
forgot to press 'record'. Sometimes deliberately.

It's been one of those semesters that seems to disappear into dust before you can turn around and identify tracks of life in the dirt. Not to say this semester has been void of the interesting; on the contrary, there were many things which kept life alive many of which I could delve into but shall refrain from doing so; my audience at large should be aware anyways... Life is more musical, in every sense of the word :D I conformed and put a smiley. But to escape from digression, on Thursday is a trip over to Yogyakarta, back home the following week rounded up with the grind of the mill the week after. Halfway through my degree, one and a half years from a lifetime away. This isn't a descent into nostalgia, I do that often enough. It's merely a statement of fact. Heh.

I sit here at my computer, putting together jumbled up thoughts and vague ideas to draw a heavy conclusion: I'm missing most of my music. Another long yet satisfying day of recording at home with the band (minus Jerry) but the sounds have receded into my laptop; songs mixed to perfection sound alien in my ears juxtaposed against our raw sound. My timing needs perfecting, my drum kit needs upgrading. I've always lacked the resources, as I do now, but it has never been a real stumbling block. I speak from multiple angles, telling parallel stories about no matter how much I may sketch an existential bohemian dramatis persona, it becomes increasingly evident that existence in inertia is useless regardless of the self-indulgence of an individual within the universe. It's something i've known for awhile but have always been reluctant to accept. It's much dandier to attribute the creation and control of happiness to oneself, and I'd be damned to admit that it was reliant on others, but obviously that is and always has been the case. That my bohemian joyful goodness is inhibited by those individuals closest and nearest to me and although it doesn't fully negate my own mind it does diversify emotions as a whole.

But I'm okay with that really, it's never been a problem to save the world together with your best mates. I'm just suffering from a little withdrawal syndrome.